Love is
by drisles
Summary: A car accident sends Jane to the hospital. One-shot. See author's note for prompt.


**A/N 1** : This little one-shot was written for a prompt from lisajp4 on tumblr. I've included the prompt at the end of the story.

* * *

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

It's the only sound Jane hears as she regains consciousness.

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

Slowly, her eyelids flutter open before the bright fluorescent light forces her to blink them shut.

Inhale.

Exhale.

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

Bright lights. Steady beeping. Stiff cotton. A gentle pinching sensation on her finger.

 _Hospital._ Jane thinks. _But why?_

A flash of headlights and the sound of crushing metal fill her senses.

 _Car crash._

Before she can conjure up the details, she's distracted by the sound of quiet sobbing. It's then she feels a small hand grasp her own. _Maura_. Jane almost smiles.

"Maura," she tries, but her dry mouth makes the words impossible to hear. She swallows, licks her lips and tries again. "Maura," she says and feels the hand in hers squeeze tightly. She squeezes back. "Don't cry. I'm ok," she assures her.

A gut wrenching sob echoes through the room.

Not expecting such an intense reaction, Jane once again opens her eyes. "Maur—," she begins, but stops when her eyes focus on the woman sitting at her bedside. "Ma?"

Angela lets out another sob as she squeezes her daughter's hand.

"Why are you crying?" Jane asks. "I'm fine, see?" she says and holds up her free hand, wiggling it. "You gotta stop worry—"

"Jane," her mother interrupts.

Sensing the pain in her mother's voice, Jane's smile slowly drops from her face as she looks around the room. "Where's Maura?"

The heart rate monitor increases in rhythm.

"Sweetheart, I'm so—" Angela chokes, "I'm so sorry," she finishes.

Beep beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

"Maura didn't make it."

Beepbeep. . .

"What?" Jane barely whispers and looks around the room once more before her eyes focus on her mother. "What? She… what?"

"I'm so sorry," Angela repeats through her tears. "The impact… the way the car hit—"

"No," Jane interrupts, "No no no, she can't… she's not… she's not dead. We were just… I just… I was just with her she, she told me…she told me..." she's panicking now. "No!"

"Sweetheart," Angela reaches out.

beepbeepbeepbeep beep beep beep beep BEEPBEEP BEEEP

"No! Maura!" Jane screams, her eyes quickly fill with tears. "Maura! Please! I can't." She begins thrashing her body, pulling at IVs, "Maura!" she sobs.

The beeping become more frantic and Angela steps away from the bed, quietly crying as the nurses enter the room.

"Miss," one of them says, "you need to calm down."

"No… Maura… I need her... no…STOP TOUCHING ME!" she screams as another set of hands hold her down. She feels a needle in her arm.

"No, please…" her voice suddenly groggy as the sedative enters her bloodstream.

"No."

"Maura," is the last thing she whispers before everything goes black.

* * *

It's raining. The perfect gloomy weather to match the mood of the car's inhabitants.

Maura sits in the passenger seat, watching raindrops roll down the window as Jane drives them home from the assisted living facility. They had just dropped off Maura's biological grandfather and Jane had dropped a bomb.

 _Casey_ , Maura thinks. The one man out of all Jane's relationships that she couldn't stand. The way he treated her best friend was unforgivable and now he wants to marry her? After years of back and forth, leaving without saying goodbye, arriving without saying hello, doing Jane's laundry, almost throwing out her marmite, deciding on major surgery without consulting the person he "loves."

 _That's not love_ , Maura thinks. _I may be socially inept at times, but I know the way he treats her is not love. Love is not masking an ultimatum with a proposal._

 _Love is putting your partner's needs above your own. Love is Sunday night dinners. Love is a fridge stocked with beer. Love is keeping an extra toothbrush in the master bathroom. Love is making sure she eats something green. Love is knowing how to make her hands stop hurting. Love is staying awake all night on the couch with her gun in your hands so she can finally get some sleep. Love is keeping Lucky Charms in the pantry. Love is letting someone's mother stay in your guesthouse, free of charge. Love is midnight calls. Love is buying Red Sox season tickets. Love is learning about baseball, even when you'd rather be shoe shopping. Love is letting her sleep in your bed when she wakes up in the middle of the night, taunted by nightmares. Love is a grey, worn out 'property of BPD' t-shirt hidden under your pillow. Love is—_

"Maura?" Jane interrupts Maura's internal monologue.

"What?" The ME asks, turning her head to look at Jane.

"I've been trying to get your attention for like, five minutes," Jane responds. She quickly glances over at her friend, noticing a single tear make its way down her cheek. "Hey," she says as she reaches out to give Maura's thigh a comforting squeeze. "Are you alright?"

Maura gives her a confused look. _Are my thoughts that obvious?_ she wonders.

Jane stops the car at a red light. "You're crying," she says and gently wipes the tear from her friend's cheek.

Maura quickly wipes at the same spot, having not even realized she'd been crying.

"Aw, you're really gonna miss that old grouch aren't you?" Jane asks, her voice containing a surprising amount of sympathy.

"What?"

"Patrick? You're gonna miss having him around?"

"Oh," Maura said. She'd already forgotten about him. "No, I wasn't thinking about him. He'll get much better care at the facility."

The light turns green.

"Well then, what's got you so distracted?"

"I was just thinking, that's all."

"About?" Jane pushes lightly.

"You," Maura blurts. "I mean, you and Casey," she clarifies. "I was thinking about his proposal, if that's what you want to call it."

"Thinking about me and Casey is making your cry?"

"No…yes. I just," she sighs, "I want you to be happy," she says quietly.

"You don't think Casey can make me happy?"

"No," Maura answers firmly.

Jane quickly looks at her, eyebrows raised at Maura's bluntness.

"Sorry, I didn't mean for that to be so…direct. But it's the truth. I don't think he would make you happy. He hasn't made you happy."

"That's not... _completely_ true."

"Yes it is. Every time he's in town—which never comes with a warning—I hardly ever see you, but on the rare chance that I do, all you ever talk about is Casey; how suffocated he makes you feel or how he tries to domesticate you; change you. Not to mention the fact that your mother doesn't approve of him and he never puts your feelings or needs above his own..."

Jane pulls up to another red light.

"…he always just shows up and leaves whenever it's convenient for him and doesn't give you a second thought. _And_ he didn't even tell you he was back from Afghanistan because of his injury. If I hadn't ran into him, he never would've told you," she continues to rant, unable to stop the momentum, "and then he had the audacity to make a decision about a life threatening surgery without even asking you? But now, because his penis works again, he just _decides_ to try it out as a couple again? Don't even get me started on his half-proposal. No ring? An ultimatum? You deserve so much better than that, Jane" she finishes with a sigh.

The rain starts to downpour as they sit at the light.

"That's quite the list you've got going there, you done?" Jane says sarcastically.

"No, I haven't even mentioned the most important reason why you shouldn't marry him," Maura replies without thinking.

"And what's that?" Jane asks curiously.

"I—" Maura catches herself, "never mind. It's nothing." She scratches her throat.

"Nuh-uh, no way. You can't just say all that and then not tell me. Come on, what is it? What's the one reason why I shouldn't marry—"

"—because I love you," Maura interrupts, her voice barely above a whisper.

"What?" Jane questions. Maura isn't sure if it's because she didn't hear her or because she's in shock.

Green light.

"I—I said I love you," Maura repeated. "I'm _in_ love with—"

Headlights. Airbags. Shattered glass. Crushed metal. Blood.

Maura's blood.

Darkness.

* * *

"Ow," is the first thing Jane says after regaining consciousness.

She reaches up, touching her forehead before bringing her hand in front of her face. Her fingertips are coated in sticky red blood.

Slowly regaining her senses, she realizes she's wet. Rain is pouring down through the broken glass.

And then she remembers: _Maura_.

"Maur?" she says.

No response.

Turning her head slowly to the right, her senses are assaulted.

The side of her car is merged together with the front of another car. The SUV's headlights are blinding.

In the distance she hears sirens. She catches a glimpse of a person exiting the SUV. But Jane can't focus on anything else except her friend.

Her friend, illuminated by headlights. Her friend who isn't moving. Her friend whose leg is contorted into a position it was not made to be in. Her friend whose beautiful golden hair is caked with blood. Her friend who isn't responding. Her friend with a split open lip. Her friend who... loves her.

Their conversation before the crash quickly comes back to her.

"No. No no no no," she says. Frantic. "Maura," she reaches out to gently hold Maura's hand. "Maura, you've gotta wake up. Please. Please, you've gotta wake up," she pleads. Her fingers press against her friend's wrist, searching for a pulse.

She can't stop the tears from falling. She can't stop her hands from shaking. She can't stop thinking about the heartbeat she's not feeling.

"Maura," she chokes.

"Maur, please..."

The sirens are loud now.

"MAURA!"

* * *

"Maura!" she yells, suddenly awake and gasping for air.

"Hey," the voice startles her and she turns her head. It's then she realizes she's back in the hospital.

 _No. No. No!_

"Hi honey," her mother says, smiling and reaching out for Jane's hand.

Jane looks at her in confusion. Then anger.

"Why are you smiling?" she asks roughly. "How can you stand there smiling when she… when Maura… when… stop smiling!" she yells, almost hysterically.

Angela frowns. "I'm smiling because I"m happy to see my baby awake."

"But what about Maura?! She's dead and you're smiling and—" the pain of her reality suddenly hits her, "oh my god, she's dead. She's—" she breaks down sobbing. She can't breathe.

"Honey, no," Angela quickly says. "Calm down, deep breaths, come on," she says, gently easing Jane back against the pillows. "Maura's alive."

"What? But you… you said… you told me she was—"

Angela's eyebrows knit together in confusion.

"When I woke up, you told me she was dead," Jane finishes.

"Oh Janie, no. You must've had a bad dream," she assures.

"Don't lie to me. Please don't lie to me," Jane begs, closing her eyes.

"I'm not lying, sweetheart. Maura's pretty banged up, but very much alive. She just got out of surgery."

Jane didn't know what to believe. What to feel. How to react. She was afraid to get too excited, only to wake up hours later in a different reality.

"I need to see her," she says. "I… I need to see her. I can't believe you if I don't… please, ma. I need to see her." She's crying now.

Angela watches, her heart breaking as her daughter, who is normally so guarded when it comes to her emotions, completely lose it.

"Let me go find your doctor. I'll see what I can do."

* * *

A short while later, Jane is being rolled down the hall in a hospital wheelchair, IV stand rolling behind her, on her way to see her friend. She's fairly certain that all of this goes against hospital protocol, but she doesn't care. She's never been so thankful for her nagging, doesn't-take-no-for-an-answer, mother.

She keeps her eyes shut until the nurses are finished rolling her up against Maura's bedside.

"Dr. Isles should be waking up any minute now," they say as they exit the room. Jane waits until they're gone and then… she pauses, listening to the monitors. _Alive. Maura is alive. This is real_ , she tells herself.

Slowly, she opens her eyes.

And there she is.

Hooked up to monitors and IVs. Bandaged and broken. Black and blue. Bloody and… alive. Eyes still closed, but the monitor… the line on the monitor… she's alive. Maura Isles is alive.

"Maura," Jane says, eyes filling with tears. She still doesn't quite believe it. She's still waiting to be pulled from her dream. She needs to see those hazel eyes; it's the only proof she'll trust.

She reaches out, wincing as pain shoots through her shoulder, but continues until Maura's hand is in her own. She squeezes.

"Open you eyes," she whispers. "Come on Maura, please. I can't do this without you, you've gotta wake up."

She gives her hand another squeeze. And waits.

* * *

Jane isn't sure how long she had been sitting at Maura's side when the ME's index finger twitched.

"Maura?"

Another twitch.

"That's it," Jane says, "come on, Maur. Open your eyes."

Slowly, ever so slowly, Maura's eyelids flutter until her beautiful hazel eyes are looking down at Jane. The brunette can't stop smiling. Or crying.

"Jane?" her voice hoarse and quiet. Maura winces as the single-syllable word pulls at the fresh stitches on her lip.

"Hi," Jane greets her with a beaming smile and squeezes her hand. "I'm so happy to see you. I thought I lost you," she says.

It takes Maura a minute to remember. "We were in a car accident," she states like a question.

Jane nods.

"But we're okay?" Maura asks, too afraid to question her injuries just yet.

"We will be," she says and leans in to kiss Maura's hand.

They're quiet for a while. Both too tired and emotionally drained to say or do anything else.

A nurse comes in, administering a drug to help Maura handle the pain. "This stuff hits pretty fast," she says to Jane, "she'll probably be out of it pretty soon," she finishes and exits the room.

Jane watches as Maura starts to relax; her eyes drooping.

"Maura," she says.

The blonde musters up all of her energy to open her eyes and look at Jane.

"I'm in love with you, too," Jane says, squeezing her hand.

Maura falls asleep with a grin on her face.

Split lip and all, it was the most beautiful smile Jane had ever seen.

* * *

 **A/N 2:** Original prompt: "Jane waking up in hospital, disoriented. Her mother is softly sobbing at her bedside. Jane asks what happend, and then remembers; car crash (flashback?) She asks if Maura is okay, but her mother has to tell her that Maura didn't make it..."

I didn't stick to it completely, b/c I just couldn't do it! I couldn't have it be so sad. Hope you enjoy.

Thoughts?


End file.
